We Need to Stop Delaying Living, for a Future That Isn’t Guaranteed

In 2021, we lost our dearest friend. He was like a brother to me – someone full of dreams who put his head down, worked hard, and postponed most of his joy for a future which none of us realised was not guaranteed. When he passed during the pandemic, every single unrealised dream went with him.

Losing someone that young and close shakes you to your core. It felt deeply unfair, and it left me wondering at how fragile everything really is. For most of my life, I have lived by expectations set by others mostly and I did so happily as disappointing the people I love did not come to me as an option. This is the usual reality for most of the eldest daughters out there, always looked at as an example. Understanding and realisation that what matters to me as an individual can be different from what people who love me and expect from me, only came in well into adulthood. And for the last few years, I have spent a lot of time thinking : How is it that I want to live my life? How can I live a fuller present and not defer my dreams for the future? Who decided what way of life is the right way? It can’t be the same for everyone.

At least five years have passed and I seem to be stuck in this loop where I feel there is just so much out there to experience and I do not wish to do it only a couple of weeks each year. While my daily reality hasn’t completely transformed overnight, the shift inside my head has been massive. I started listening to my own voice, believing in what feels right to me. My husband and I focus on what matters to us and make an effort to lead our lives in a way that keeps us happy, learning to be more present each day.

When you go through such a significant mindset shift, you start looking at different aspects of your life from that lens, especially the ones that take up most of your time – which in my case has been my work.

Redefining What Work Means to Me

My relationship with work used to be simple: it proved my capability, success and formed the majority of my life goals. Today, I look at it differently. Work is meant to give me exposure, help me build new skills, keep me curious, and provide enough financial security to live a happy and healthy life both now and later – not just when I retire.

I have worked 12-hour+ work days for the last decade and that has made this balance hard. I have had multiple phases of burnout, increased headaches and gut issues – that have pushed me further to change my lifestyle and try to reimagine my professional life. I have always been ambitious but now I do not want to let the daily stress take over, be left with zero energy to do the things I love, grow old being only involved in the hustle and throw away the gift of being alive.

Finding Pockets of Reset in Nature

And living in a big city means being trapped in constant hustle, even enjoying it at times. To stay grounded, I’ve had to be deliberate about finding my tiny pockets of reset.
Sometimes it is as simple as pausing to watch the sunset – whether it is dramatic or muted, it gives me a moment of hope. When the city feels suffocating, we head for the mountains or the coast. It is incredible to feel the cold wind on my face and breathe in the clean air, or stand on a beach letting the rhythm of the waves wash over my feet. Being near the ocean or standing beneath giant mountains reminds me how tiny we are in this universe, and maybe we give more importance to our daily worries than we need to. Travel has been a constant source of elixir for my husband and I. We are the happiest when we are exploring and we try to make time for this joy of our life as often as we are able to.

Travel as a Way to Live Many Lives

Whenever people ask me how many countries I’ve visited, I feel an immediate resistance. To me, turning travel into a country count feels like just another race.

I don’t travel to tick off a list. I travel because it helps me understand people, places and myself better. It lets me live multiple lives in one. Books used to do that for me, but traveling made it real. It pulls me out of my narrow routines and drops me into other ways of existing.
It has also given me a sense of freedom I didn’t realize I was starving for. Walking through Rio de Janeiro, for instance, what stayed with me wasn’t a landmark—it was how open, carefree, and unapologetically authentic people were in their own skin. As a woman who constantly worries about safety, societal judgment, and doing the “right” thing, being in spaces where people live freely showed me what kind of life I want to build.

A Choice Grounded in Privilege

Travel is not an escape from reality, nor is it a cure-all. It has uncomfortable, messy moments just like everyday life. I also know plenty of people who feel disconnected from travel because coming back to routine feels even heavier afterward. Everyone experiences it differently.

Most of all, I know that being able to step back, re-evaluate, and see the world is a privilege. Choosing how to live your days takes effort, but having the room to make that choice in the first place is a luxury I don’t take lightly.

I am still very much a work in progress. But I refuse to keep deferring my life to a future that was never guaranteed to begin with.